Why do people

****
****

Insist on believing
That if you don't do anything
When evil is happening
That somehow you still come out innocent

When it's exactly the opposite
That is true
Somehow they think it's never
Going to come around

Somehow they think
They're never

Going to get their due



Neils
5:35 pm
03/23/2005

The only thing

****
****

The only thing
Worse than no hope

Is

False hope




Neils
5:31 pm
03/23/2005

As to why

As to why….

I got into it because it was romantic
Because to be truthful it turned on girls
Later I found out it had something
To do with my soul and the rest of the world

I got into it because my friend did
And I thought he was the definition of cool
He had been in Special Forces and by example
Showed all things are not learned in school

I got into it because I started reading
Things like Shelly’s Ode To The West Wind
It took me a while to cry at that to see it
As deeply as did my friend

I got into it because I started hearing it
In music and leaves blowing in the wind
I got into it because I saw a way to live
To where you did not have to fake it and pretend



Neils
9:52 pm
03/16/2005
*
transcribed this time
10:22 pm
03/16/2005

All these precious things

****
****

How hard can you squeeze a nickle
How hard can you squeeze a dime
About as hard as you can squeeze
A clock to get a little more time

How soft can you hold your baby
How soft can you drive her wild
How do you hold a porupine
How do you cherish a smile

How can you finish the job of love
And bless the dearly departed
You pile up all these precious things
And then off they get carted

How do we know when to be alone
Why don't we know we already are
How can we not see the nights sun
When it's right there in every star

How close can humans get to truth
How close can people get to perfection
And why aren't miracles guaranteed
If we go their direction....

How come I'm being interrogated
How come I'm the only one in the room
How come they're never so obvious
As puting revolving doors on tombs

Why are they in the masks and faces
Why are they in the wonder and awe
How can they be a part of everything
I ever felt heared smelled or saw



Neils
about 1993
*
transcribed this time
4:44 pm
03/15/2005

A question and a matter of time

What is it
That you search for
Amongst these
Scattered dust fragments

These rumpled sheets
Broken staircases
And
Unspoken vows

What bard of patience
In the graveyard grasses
Will you be
Calling on now



Neils
about 1992

Fantasy Park

Fantasy Park

I want to go to the Fantasy Park
Where the rides are deep in blood
Where the gaiety and piety
Pour through the gates like a flood

And the cotton candy is spun
On pink nightmares of hair
Where the boardwalk is made for the fun
Clown whores have when they don't care

I want to go to the Fantasy Park
Where the tests of strength are rigged
Where drug addicts run the booths
And the only thing that counts is your big

****
****

I want to go the Fantasy Park
And get my future told
By some lying sell out idiot gypsy bitch
Whose heart is dark and cold

I want to see the neon burning
And look up into the sky
I want to bear witness to the night
Dedicated to make the children cry

I want to go the the Fantasy Park
Where the patrons get scared to death
And give away all their youth and truth
To the things that steal life's breath

****
****

I want to go into the evening
And lay my quarters down
To win the Cupie Doll of my dreams
And dance to the maddening sound

Of the Calypso spinning
And throwing people out
I want to go where you hear
Their dying screaming futile shouts

As they plummet to the earth
And or are impaled upon the poles
Of the tents erected for the show
Designed specifically

To rob you of your soul

****
****

Where there's the jingling of coins
Saw dust bright colors and grinding gears
From the machinery that creates
The smoke screen of persuasion and fear

Because innocense has no place here
Baby .... You're on your own
Didn't you catch the sign when you came in
At best

It's a Spiritual War Zone



Neils
5/18/97
written within a week
during The New Victorian Era
*
transcribed this time
9:55 pm
03/06/2005
*